ARTHUR ARCHIVES 2 - GRANVILLE T. WOODS

(MUSIC)

1909, NOVEMBER 5TH. FRIDAY, 2:30AM, NEWSPAPER OFFICE LONDON

(TYPEWRITER)

INTERVIEWER

Dear... me? Ha! Dear me? Dear me indeed, well, dear mes I guess. Today the most extraordinary thing happened... and you’ll never even get to read these words.

(LOOKS AT THE TIME)

Oh good lord, is that the time already! Well I guess the clean up did take quite a while. Who would have thought there would have been so much ooze. Yuck!! Anyway, as it’s 2:30 in the morning, technically it was yesterday that I met you. And yesterday that I lost you. Time is indeed fleeting, no matter how much of it you are blessed to have.

(SIPS)

Oh, I hope you don’t mind, but seeing as though you both … sort of exploded all over my office, I decided to drink what would have been your share of the seltzer. So... cheers!

(TAKES ANOTHER SIP)

Ah! Three of me… Just imagine all the things we could have achieved together. For one, we could have made an extra couple of Langstons and gone our separate ways to explore the four corners of the world and... well, three corners to begin with I suppose? Meaning that whoever finishes their corner first would start on the fourth? Or I suppose we could have drawn straws for the fourth and... oh! No, no, wait a minute! Hahaha! Oh how silly of me! Yes, we could have made a fourth copy couldn’t we! Ah! Endless possibilities. Ah! The mind boggles.

(THINKS. SIGHS)

Oh, no, no that would never work. I’m quite sure we could have convinced Langston to copy himself twice, if for no other reason, than to simply take care of the other two of us. I feel however, that he may have drawn the line at producing even more copies. Hmm... we could have met in different locations each year to swap stories over a glass of seltzer. One with a slice of lemon, thank you!

(SIPS)

one with a slice of lime, and one plain.

(LAUGHS)

(EXCITED) Ha! Think of the fun we could have had telling people we were long lost triplets, or checking-in to the same hotel under the same name just a few minutes apart, to see the look of confusion on the receptionists face! Oh! They would have thought they were going mad. That would have been a lot of fun. Oh well, c’est la vie!

(THINKS)

Then again, we could have all stayed just here couldn’t we, and ran the newspaper together. Perhaps we could have taken it in turns? Or one of you could have even... taken over...?

(REALISATION)

Damn! Just when things were going so well. You know I really was beginning to think that this newspaper was it for me. I’ve felt so fulfilled these last few years. So... on top of my game. I never even noticed that I might be longing for something different. Something new. Until I came face to face with the pair of you. Seeing you both in my office today, yesterday, reminded me of all the possibilities that there are out there. All the lives I’ve lead, and all those to come. Perhaps it was no coincidence? Or rather, it was wasn’t it. It was a co... incidence! Oh that’s good! I’ll have to remember that! A co-incidence with myself. Hm! (SIGHS) How nice it would be to divide ourselves in two. To split the workload and achieve twice as much in half the time. Turns out it’s not possible. Even with a doomsday machine.

(SIPS)

All you’re left with is a room full of goo, and a bitter taste in the mouth. Although that could be the seltzer! I have drunk quite a lot of seltzer…

(BURPS)

Oh… excuse me. Ahhh!

(HE PLACES THE GLASS ON THE DESK AND GETS UP FROM HIS CHAIR)

I will miss this office.

(HE WALKS ACROSS THE ROOM AND OPENS THE OFFICE DOOR. HE STOPS AT THE DOORWAY)

Thank you both, for opening my eyes again, and allowing me to see beyond the Daily Phoenix.

(HICCUPS)

Time for bed.

(HE LEAVES THE ROOM AND CLOSES THE DOOR)

CREDITS

This episode featured and was written by Alan Burgon.

Music and sound design by Adam Raymonda, editing by Philip Thorne, graphic design by Anders Pedersen and production assistance by Maty Parzival. The Arthur Archives are dedicated to Bryce Godmer, more regular episode and bonus minisodes coming soon!