EMPRESS GREY

ALVINA

(DISBELIEVING)

Not the Alicia Cairn.

INTERVIEWER

(JOYFUL)

Yes! Alicia Cairn!

ALVINA

Alicia Cairn...

INTERVIEWER

The one and only!

BOTH

Alicia Cairn!

(THEY LAUGH)

INTERVIEWER

I'm so excited... Everything's ready. There's a pot of Empress Grey brewing.

ALVINA

Of course. Her favorite.

INTERVIEWER

With a slice of lemon.

ALVINA

Well, when you're done I want to know all about it.

INTERVIEWER

(SERIOUS AGAIN)

Of course. How do I look?

ALVINA

Um... fine…?

(THE DISTANT THUD OF OBJECTS HITTING THE GROUND, CLATTERING)

Can you hear that?

(WE HEAR JOEY AND SALVATORE SHOUTING OUT WARNINGS AND SWEARING IN ITALIAN. SOUND OF GLASS? BREAKING)

INTERVIEWER

Well lick me like a lolly. What's happening?

(MORE THUDDING, CRASHING, SHATTERING, GETTING LOUDER, THE VOICE OF A WOMAN SAYING ‘Very good’ BUT THAT IS ALL WE UNDERSTAND, IT COMES CLOSER, THEN FADES INTO THE FAMILIAR BEEPING:)

ØYSTEIN

Alicia Cairn. Episode 3 of The Amelia Project. Coming soon.